The Great Pacific Northwest Python Migration

The Python Caurus, commonly known as the Pacific Northwest Python, is a non-venomous species of the Pythonidae Family, famous for its distinctive plaid coloring.


The bizarre plaid pattern of the python helps it camouflage in its native habitat, in and around coffee shops. Many of the pythons wear silly hipster glasses, which were originally thought to be a part of their camouflage, but further research has shown that they just have poor vision and bad fashion sense.

The male and female pythons are nearly indistinguishable, but in times of great stress, the males can grow hair on their upper lips.


The Pacific Northwest Python live near coffee shops, because they provide the three most important ingredients for the python to survive: caffeine, high-calorie/low-nutritional snacks, and wifi.

The pythons like to live and develop in a clean environment so they are exceptionally good at recycling and garbage clean up. Though many pythons will complain about the weather, they must like it because they seem resistant to moving south to warmer climates.

The Great Migration

In early October, the pythons will travel to the banks of the Willamette River to get over-caffeinated, meet other pythons, and talk about programming, research, data analysis, education, documentation, why the dickens 3 divided by 2 equals 1, gluten-free raspberry pi recipes, and anything else you might like to talk about.

To learn more about the Great Migration, see